Thursday, May 29, 2008

Tee for Tennessee

Dolly Parton…
Did you know she was the inspiration for creating a program to make sure all children in Tennessee have access to books so that they might cultivate a love of reading? And I think she knows Burton Reynolds. Why wouldn’t she be your hero?

You could buy a shirt. Don’t make us ask, Tennessee is the volunteer state.

Available in Pretty Prim Plum (ladies S,M, and L)
Mountain Man Teal (S,M,and L)
On your favorite Appalachian apparel shirts
Price $20 plus shipping
please include size, Men's/Women's and color preference

Friday, May 9, 2008

Speed dial this for trouble!

Leave us alone already! After much outcry and public haranguing we at Isle of Printing have bent to popular will and have made available for the first time ever a public safety tool par excellence. Not to be taken lightly, this device’s power is inversely proportionate to its size (and it is a wee small thing). Wear it with both pride and a grave sense of civic responsibility because after all Honey bear IS watching and I THINK he is our friend but I am not absolutely certain.

Unleash its power at your own peril and definitely to the mortal danger of those who are riding on the bad track.

Honey bear is Watching official Deputy Pin Badges

Only one dollar plus shipping!…Why? Because safety should bear no higher bar.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Unsavory terrorism plot discovered in plain sight!

Stop the presses it turns out the Neo-cons were right all along!

Saddam Hussein did indeed have weapons of mass destruction, not in Iraq...but IN OUR OWN COUNTRY! Weapons cleverly disguised as good ole’ American truck stop pizza pie! More over with duplicitous use of marketing and graphic design, he has apparently been feeding WMD’s to us for years. Lured in with tales of "all toppings no extra charge”…millions of Americans have been consuming the treacherous former dictator’s poisonous concoction of artery clogging cheese and reaganomic servings of “vegetables” with a smile on their faces! One look into Saddam’s glib continence as he tosses another wheel of death into our innocent gaping mouths and you know this war on terror must be won and soon!

Proud to be an American my ass! That isn’t Lugi and that ain’t no American pie.

True it is probable that the administration has kept these facts secret until now to protect methods and means of the brave patriots collecting intelligence on our behalf in pizzerias the world over. But we at Electrosports Monthly would be poor stewards of liberty if we let you be fooled for one minute more.

Rest assured with very little sacrifice or disruption to our daily lives, one day America’s enemies will be cut into warring slices, and be tossed like a discarded pizza box into the trash bin of history. That is assuming we don’t die from the various complications of obesity first.

Remember this

Who knew one pizza box could say so much about modern life?